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Tulpa Discussion / tulpa-questions
A place for tulpa-related questions and resources. Broad discussion topics go in #tulpa-discussion. If you are new, please check out the pinned messages. Forum Link to Tulpa Questions: https://community.tulpa.info/forum/13-tulpa-questions-answers/
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StarlieCharlie [@ ON]
Is it alright if I ask what co-fronting feels like? Like how is the body split?
perfectly alright, and it's what I've been doing with blank for a few days now. Have you switched at all before? For us, switching is like... re-attributing who owns and drives the "capabilities" our mind has (imagination, movement of the body, control of the stream-of-consciousness, etc). The specific capabilities I take control of, and how deeply I control them, is something that's decided per-session--eg sometimes I just want control of the imagination, because I really like the idea of a video game, and I want to imagine what it'd be like, or something like that--other times, I want to control the body so I can go type out a bunch of stuff on here, that kind of stuff. Co-fronting is an extension of that--blank gets control of the stream-of-consciousness, or decides what we're gonna do next, but I get control of the body, control of reflexes, all that kind of stuff, so I get to actually drive it. It's similar to blending, but stuff stays distinct, I feel like myself, and we both get to help with the day-to-day. Now, I still stay in the back for work, but on the weekends, it's been pretty much fully co-fronting for a couple weeks now :)
3:44 AM
Note: our experience of switching/possession/etc is different from the old-school ways of thinking about it--I don't feel like I'm lifting a boulder when in control of the arms and stuff, blank doesn't go to the wonderland or anything, etc etc. I just feel like me, but I get to be in the body, instead of in the head.
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blanka
perfectly alright, and it's what I've been doing with blank for a few days now. Have you switched at all before? For us, switching is like... re-attributing who owns and drives the "capabilities" our mind has (imagination, movement of the body, control of the stream-of-consciousness, etc). The specific capabilities I take control of, and how deeply I control them, is something that's decided per-session--eg sometimes I just want control of the imagination, because I really like the idea of a video game, and I want to imagine what it'd be like, or something like that--other times, I want to control the body so I can go type out a bunch of stuff on here, that kind of stuff. Co-fronting is an extension of that--blank gets control of the stream-of-consciousness, or decides what we're gonna do next, but I get control of the body, control of reflexes, all that kind of stuff, so I get to actually drive it. It's similar to blending, but stuff stays distinct, I feel like myself, and we both get to help with the day-to-day. Now, I still stay in the back for work, but on the weekends, it's been pretty much fully co-fronting for a couple weeks now :)
StarlieCharlie [@ ON] 8/21/2023 3:46 AM
Thank you! Also to your question: I am still in the forcing stage of creating them so I can’t yet
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StarlieCharlie [@ ON]
Thank you! Also to your question: I am still in the forcing stage of creating them so I can’t yet
Understandable! Switching is both really easy to do, and really hard to communicate how to do 😅 if you ever want advice on it, I can do my best at communicating some of what helps me
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blanka
Understandable! Switching is both really easy to do, and really hard to communicate how to do 😅 if you ever want advice on it, I can do my best at communicating some of what helps me
StarlieCharlie [@ ON] 8/21/2023 3:57 AM
Not rn but when they form and if they actually want to leave headspace I’ll hit you up if you’re still willing by then
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Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya 8/21/2023 5:21 AM
I'm not certain, but I've practiced self hypnosis for over a decade and I am super aware of how it "feels" to enter the hypnotic brainwave state. I think the secret to switching may lie with hypnosis. I feel the same sensations and feelings as with the alpha brainwave state associated with hypnotic switching when I let a tulpa take the driver's seat. It would also explain why its so hard to put into words how to do it. A lot of things can help with mediation and alpha states, though. You can look it up if you like, I dont have anything direct to offer since for us it is very natural to do without outside aid.
5:21 AM
But relaxation, clearing your mind, and focusing on what you want is a great way to achive anything
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Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya
I'm not certain, but I've practiced self hypnosis for over a decade and I am super aware of how it "feels" to enter the hypnotic brainwave state. I think the secret to switching may lie with hypnosis. I feel the same sensations and feelings as with the alpha brainwave state associated with hypnotic switching when I let a tulpa take the driver's seat. It would also explain why its so hard to put into words how to do it. A lot of things can help with mediation and alpha states, though. You can look it up if you like, I dont have anything direct to offer since for us it is very natural to do without outside aid.
StarlieCharlie [@ ON] 8/21/2023 5:23 AM
That’s kind of perfect, I’m a huge psychology nerd and know ALL about hypnosis
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Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya 8/21/2023 5:24 AM
Me too! Personally I fall into "highly hypnotizable" group so I picked up hypnosis almost instantly when I saw a hypnotherapist year ago
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StarlieCharlie [@ ON] 8/21/2023 5:24 AM
I know exactly what state-of-mind you’re talking about too; it’s called an “OBE” btw (edited)
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Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya 8/21/2023 5:24 AM
I never knew what it was called. I've done tons of exporation on my own but haven't had too much in the way of text-book study on the subject
5:25 AM
Personaly the brain and what it can do just fascinates me.
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StarlieCharlie [@ ON] 8/21/2023 5:25 AM
Agreed
5:25 AM
I wasn’t liked in elementary for it tho XD (edited)
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Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya 8/21/2023 5:27 AM
Lol
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StarlieCharlie [@ ON] 8/21/2023 5:41 AM
I don’t really care what people do tho, as long I have some friends, it’s fine
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Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya
How did you get here without knowing what a tulpa was?
Deleted User 8/21/2023 6:07 AM
The game “Who’s Lila” 💀
6:07 AM
Also if I were to make a tulpa could I just sorta get rid of it if I don’t want one? Like say goodbye to it and leave it away
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Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya 8/21/2023 6:08 AM
I've heard people say that's an option, though not one I've ever considered.
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Tewi: Yes, but it's pretty terrible to go into it expecting to do something like that. (edited)
6:12 AM
Tulpas can be lifelong companions, so treating them like a toy or something is really mean.
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Deleted User
Also if I were to make a tulpa could I just sorta get rid of it if I don’t want one? Like say goodbye to it and leave it away
Yeah, it's something you could do, some people frown upon it, but it's possible. There are very obviously some moral and ethical concerns, but I'm not here to debate that, that's up for you to decide if you think is right, but, you generally shouldn't be making a Tulpa if you can picture yourself just tossing the whole idea into the trash once you get bored or get sick of it, if you don't think you could commit to something long-term, or if you cannot swallow that fear at some point, I wouldn't suggest trying to make a tulpa.
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Tewi: That too, I don't think it's especially worth pursuing if you barely care in the first place. (edited)
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Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya 8/21/2023 6:27 AM
At this point doing that to one of my tulpas would feel like murder. I can't even think about it, or imagine life without them
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Deleted User
Also if I were to make a tulpa could I just sorta get rid of it if I don’t want one? Like say goodbye to it and leave it away
KiTkAT( •̀ .̫ •́ )✧/jk 8/21/2023 8:05 AM
yes you could, it would just not be worth your time to start if this is your approach (edited)
8:07 AM
it’s always good to know that you have that option in case you need it. all the ethical/moral talks that people read somewhere and keep repeating is just disabling you as a tulpamancer (edited)
8:08 AM
fully committing to having a tulpa will get you much further with the practice and will make it more convincing though
8:09 AM
don’t let other people shame you into thinking you can’t stop the practice or reverse anything
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Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya 8/21/2023 9:08 AM
I am not repeating anything nor have read anything, I was merely stating my own opinion regarding my personal tulpas and experience with them. Everyone has their own morals and ideals and I respect that. Though I do think that if you go into this with the mindset that they are not going to be sentient or their own selves you will likely have trouble manifesting and/or restrict their growth. (edited)
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KiTkAT( •̀ .̫ •́ )✧/jk 8/21/2023 9:22 AM
sorry i wasn’t talking about you because yeah you talk about your experience i agree about the second paragraph, treating a tulpa as a sentient being that you use morals towards as you do with people irl will change and probably deepen the experience - but you can have a satisfying experience without it, depends on what you expect and are looking for in your practice (edited)
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Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya 8/21/2023 10:09 AM
I don't know if it would help to share my personal experience, but when my first tulpa manifested I was trying to treat the whole thing as a purely scientific experiment and observation. This limited my tulpa so much as I didn't truly believe she existed, but that she was simply a self protected coping mechanism created by my mind. It took me a while to realize that: A) It actually didn't matter how she was created. B) I didn't care. She was real to me. Practically instantly, my tulpa began rapidly evolving. Like within minutes of having that epiphany, realization, and consciously choosing to believe she was real, she truly became sentient and started acting on her own. I was holding her back so much. (edited)
10:10 AM
I still feel so bad about doing that to her... she was like that for months.
10:13 AM
So you might get somewhere with treating them as something to play with - I'm not saying it isn't possible. But you likely won't get the full experience. (edited)
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KiTkAT( •̀ .̫ •́ )✧/jk 8/21/2023 10:46 AM
yep, overthinking, overintellectualisation and logical approach is something i always bring up as something that just slows down progress and i try to help people understand it doesn’t matter how it works, if it’s real or not - the experience is real and that’s all that matters (edited)
10:48 AM
but that’s a separate thing than using morals you would have to an irl person imo, which as I mention often can be a problem in itself. for example, in my view tulpamancy should improve your life and make you happier, not make you feel bad for months because you did something that objectively is not a bad thing. sorry to hear you feel bad (edited)
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Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya
I still feel so bad about doing that to her... she was like that for months.
I'd say to be careful with that kind of feeling ^^° Can be painful if you stay focused on that (saying from experience). Be happy you found a way over that and enjoy that ^^ Never regret that you didn't do it from from the beginning, the important is that you grew.
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Ra'ini
I'd say to be careful with that kind of feeling ^^° Can be painful if you stay focused on that (saying from experience). Be happy you found a way over that and enjoy that ^^ Never regret that you didn't do it from from the beginning, the important is that you grew.
Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya 8/21/2023 8:41 PM
I know. I've talked to her about it before, and she doesn't seem to percieve that time in a negative way.
8:41 PM
I just would have done it differently if I'd known.
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Ulithium_Dragon | Maledy | Freya
I just would have done it differently if I'd known.
That's part of the journey ^^ We learn along the way
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pk; help
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PluralKit BOT 8/23/2023 9:57 PM
(edited)
PluralKit
PluralKit is a bot designed for plural communities on Discord, and is open for anyone to use. It allows you to register systems, maintain system information, set up message proxying, log switches, and more.
How do I get started?
To get started using PluralKit, try running the following commands (of course replacing the relevant names with your own): 1. pk;system new - Create a system (if you haven't already) 2. pk;member add John - Add a new member to your system 3. pk;member John proxy [text] - Set up [square brackets] as proxy tags 4. You're done! You can now type [a message in brackets] and it'll be proxied appropriately. 5. Optionally, you may set an avatar from the URL of an image with pk;member John avatar [link to image], or from a file by typing pk;member John avatar and sending the message with an attached image. See the Getting Started guide for more information.
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Drake (DustyAngel47) 8/23/2023 10:00 PM
#tupperbox-pluralkit
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hey, i wanted to ask, why would i want a tulpa? like, what are the benefits in my day to day life?
10:02 PM
i read the FAQ and the website, but i wanted to ask actual people who did it
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that's something you can really only figure out for yourself, but some of the reasons i wanted a headmate were because i wanted that lifelong friend who understands me to a fault that i never had the chance to get in my childhood/adolesence
10:04 PM
alongside a really strong accountability buddy to ensure the body and the space it inhabits gets the care they both deserve
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do you let your tulpa interact with other people in your body irl?
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joocp
hey, i wanted to ask, why would i want a tulpa? like, what are the benefits in my day to day life?
you see, it's very simple: im just silly :3 (just kidding) but IMO, there's a few reasons that would be common, and have applied to blank and I: 1. expands your understanding of yourself: doing cocreation (tulpamancy) can help enlighten you on how your own mind works in regards to identity 2. yay! friendship! This is a legitimate reason--I am a good friend and advocate for blank; and while I cannot replace a social life, I can be a complement to it 3. can be used as a form of meditation: even if you don't expand your understanding of yourself, it can be relaxing to spend time inside your own head 4. exercise for imagination: a lot of the common methods used for cocreation can be very helpful for working out imaginative and creative (not literal) muscles in your brain
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joocp
do you let your tulpa interact with other people in your body irl?
oh god, I've tried but my social anxiety is way worse than blank's (and we're both kinda embarrassed about switching). I also don't much like the body's voice, which is a big hindrance to socializing irl
10:08 PM
I'm happy with online communication for now, but maybe someday I'll be more comfortable with irl socialization
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Shinso 🔷 Sapphire Safehaven 3(🏝)0 BOT 8/23/2023 10:08 PM
We do yeah, it’s just we’re kinda hermits so we use the body but don’t socialise with people outside the system very often, we mostly just study and work towards getting our degree
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joocp ↩️
Reply to: do you let your tulpa interact with other people in your body irl?
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joocp
do you let your tulpa interact with other people in your body irl?
it's been tricky but kb has been able to front and be engaged with the world before, they haven't interacted with anyone who knew it was them and not me but we think it still counts
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kaybee
it's been tricky but kb has been able to front and be engaged with the world before, they haven't interacted with anyone who knew it was them and not me but we think it still counts
so does kb act like they're you in these situation? and do you do it often?
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blanka
oh god, I've tried but my social anxiety is way worse than blank's (and we're both kinda embarrassed about switching). I also don't much like the body's voice, which is a big hindrance to socializing irl
oh yeah we know the feeling, it's not too embarrassing to switch and use the body but we're both still finding the right time to have them front and also be able to say to someone "hey this isn't izzy this is actually kaybee"
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also, if you have multiple tulpas, do they interact together?
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Shinso 🔷 Sapphire Safehaven 3(🏝)0 BOT 8/23/2023 10:10 PM
Yeah
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joocp ↩️
Reply to: also, if you have multiple tulpas, do they interact together?
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kaybee
oh yeah we know the feeling, it's not too embarrassing to switch and use the body but we're both still finding the right time to have them front and also be able to say to someone "hey this isn't izzy this is actually kaybee"
yeah! I can type on the internet, play video games, make music, all that just fine but actually interacting with people is a mortifying idea
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joocp
do you let your tulpa interact with other people in your body irl?
Yep, I regularly interact with people IRL, although I do not announce myself as myself!
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Shinso 🔷 Sapphire Safehaven 3(🏝)0
Yeah
in that case, wouldnt it be better to have multiple tulpas to let them have someone to talk to while you're not able to?
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joocp
so does kb act like they're you in these situation? and do you do it often?
kaybee and me still have a fair bit of overlap, but i'd say some differences include our speech intonation and general mood overall (kaybee only seems to front when they're pretty happy, so that might just be when they're most able to though, they experience the same range of emotions we have when they're in headspace)
10:12 PM
and kb is the only headmate i have, so i can't answer that 2nd one
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joocp
in that case, wouldnt it be better to have multiple tulpas to let them have someone to talk to while you're not able to?
I'm not in a multi-headmate system, eg it's just me and blank, but I'd argue that when the attention is away from a headmate they are not developing or talking
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aapeli 🟣🥫🥔 ae 8/23/2023 10:13 PM
your brain can only do a couple of things at a time
10:13 PM
you could almost say that it does only 1 thing at a time
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joocp
in that case, wouldnt it be better to have multiple tulpas to let them have someone to talk to while you're not able to?
kaybee understands when i'm too occupied to interact with them, because i still take the time to do so when i have the ability
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blanka
I'm not in a multi-headmate system, eg it's just me and blank, but I'd argue that when the attention is away from a headmate they are not developing or talking
Drake (DustyAngel47) 8/23/2023 10:13 PM
unless, of course, your brain pretends they were (because you believe they were) and it backfills what "happened"
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Shinso 🔷 Sapphire Safehaven 3(🏝)0 BOT 8/23/2023 10:14 PM
Well, that last part isn’t exactly how it works but for us having multiple people is a decently fun experience
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joocp ↩️
Reply to: in that case, wouldnt it be better to have multiple tulpas to let them have someone to talk to while…
10:14 PM
I wouldn’t say it’s better or worse, just a matter of personal preference
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Drake (DustyAngel47)
unless, of course, your brain pretends they were (because you believe they were) and it backfills what "happened"
You can even backfill what 'happened' if you know it didn't.
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Drake (DustyAngel47) 8/23/2023 10:15 PM
well yes but y'know
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Drake (DustyAngel47)
unless, of course, your brain pretends they were (because you believe they were) and it backfills what "happened"
yes, I am dubious on the utility of that particular experience--the backfill, I mean. But I can't be sure of it, I'm just 2
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Drake (DustyAngel47)
well yes but y'know
I know, just expanding on what you said :3 (edited)
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what's backfilling?
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aapeli 🟣🥫🥔 ae 8/23/2023 10:15 PM
making up
10:15 PM
stuff
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joocp
what's backfilling?
eg backfilling a memory--making up something to fill in a gap
10:15 PM
eg
10:16 PM
3 headmates; one fronting, two not, the one fronting ignores the other 2 for a few hours, then asks them what they've been up to the brain isn't really doing anything during those few hours for the other 2, but the brain can magic up some memories of what "happened" during that time I am skeptical of the utility of that, but I do not disparage anyone that has that experience and finds it useful (edited)
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(sorry my internet keeps cutting off) what would be the disadvantages of backfilling? and how does your tulpa ask for your attention if they're "off" when you're not giving them attention?
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aapeli 🟣🥫🥔 ae 8/23/2023 10:21 PM
they just say something to you
10:21 PM
a thought pops up
10:21 PM
its a lot harder for that to happen if you are concentrating on something though (edited)
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joocp
(sorry my internet keeps cutting off) what would be the disadvantages of backfilling? and how does your tulpa ask for your attention if they're "off" when you're not giving them attention?
If I'm not being paid attention to, I can usually interject on something if I feel like I could be useful--it depends on sleep, stress, etc on whether or not I'm able to. I'm not sure what the actual mechanism is, but it feels like (subjectively, to me, and to blank) that I'm sitting and observing passively when not being paid attention to, and I can decide when to speak up
10:24 PM
it feels like a thought from me, yeah--that's another thing, headmate communication is just thoughts, but they "feel" like they're coming from another source
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it's been a little invalidating, i'll admit, but i've only really had kaybee to come to the front of my mind recently when i actively see anything that reminds me of plurality/tulpamancy
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kaybee
it's been a little invalidating, i'll admit, but i've only really had kaybee to come to the front of my mind recently when i actively see anything that reminds me of plurality/tulpamancy
it's okay--I'm not "always online" all the time, either. It's not an uncommon experience
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blanka
If I'm not being paid attention to, I can usually interject on something if I feel like I could be useful--it depends on sleep, stress, etc on whether or not I'm able to. I'm not sure what the actual mechanism is, but it feels like (subjectively, to me, and to blank) that I'm sitting and observing passively when not being paid attention to, and I can decide when to speak up
so basically, when you're not actively getting attention, you go from the "conscious" to the "subconscious"?
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blanka
it's okay--I'm not "always online" all the time, either. It's not an uncommon experience
i see, that's a good thing to hear
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joocp
so basically, when you're not actively getting attention, you go from the "conscious" to the "subconscious"?
mmm kinda but I don't know if those words really apply--it's more like, if blank is "steering the boat," so to speak, down the "stream of consciousness," I'm a passenger on the boat too (assuming good rest, no stress, etc); so I can approach the current pilot and communicate with them, even if they're focused on the river
10:26 PM
and when we're switched, I pilot the boat--like I'm doing now :)
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how does it feel when you switch? both for the tulpa and the host?
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that's a little subjective for everyone, but i can answer for a lot of cases i've heard of including my own
10:28 PM
you still retain your base awareness that the brain holds onto when it's conscious, it's just that the 'i' in 'who am i?' will change depending on who's up front
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(sorry if i'm asking too much, but i just discovered tulpamancy like a week ago and i want to make sure to know what i'm getting into before i try to do it) (edited)
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joocp
i read the FAQ and the website, but i wanted to ask actual people who did it
KiTkAT( •̀ .̫ •́ )✧/jk 8/23/2023 10:28 PM
if you read faq and website and are looking for us to give you reasons to have a tulpa, it might not be for you usually people find reasons for themselves just after learning about them
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joocp
how does it feel when you switch? both for the tulpa and the host?
agreed with izzy that it's subjective--it feels very similar to not switching, as in, nothing feels different. I simply get to steer where the brain goes, in the same way blank can when he's fronting
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with the act of switching, we usually get goosebumps when kaybee comes to the front and all our senses feel just a little more sharp
10:29 PM
but it returns to normal very quickly
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Saying it "feels" like something is a bit of a weird way to frame it (but it is perfectly reasonable to ask that!!)--it's more like, who gets the attributed as the one in control of the actions/thoughts? Who "owns" who you are right now, so to speak?
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joocp
(sorry if i'm asking too much, but i just discovered tulpamancy like a week ago and i want to make sure to know what i'm getting into before i try to do it) (edited)
we are always happy to talk about it :) when we're awake and available at least haha
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